Friday I spent time working on an ad for a pediatric dentist who was congratulating his patients who'd had perfect check-ups during the past month. By the end I was gritting my teeth and rubbing my forehead where the tension headache was beginning. Because one my biggest peeves is the way people name their children.
I hate oddball names that I've seen in the past, like Pantera and Wiggles. I hate when people name their kids after soap opera characters. I hate when people get "creative" with the spelling, like Christen or Rebeckha. I hate cutesy names like Misty and Kylie and Brandi, and I especially hate them when they end with a double "e." It may seem adorable on an apple-cheeked, curly-haired girl of five, but it's not terribly impressive on a resume or business card, unless the job involves a G-string and dancing around a pole.
Some of the names that I found especially irriating were:
• Kynleigh
• Jaydi
• BrittanyJo (yes, all one word)
• Caidyn (there were actually two of them!)
• Kennedy
• Makenzie
• Paderic
• Mikhaila
• Jacen
• Lunden
• Bryton
• Alyvia ("Olivia" creatively spelled, perhaps?)
• IdaMae (again, one word)
• Blakeman
• Laif
It was such a relief to see a Mary, a couple of Stephens, a David or two, and an Allison. Maybe their parents won't get points for originality, but at least I don't feel the urge to track them down and slap them silly.m
